People Change

It’s not his birthday and it’s not Father’s Day.

It’s just the Sunday before Memorial Day.

But I wanted to take some time to acknowledge Greg and how impressed I am with him as a Father.

One of the things I love most about Greg is that he never thinks he has it all together.

Sure sometimes he thinks he’s an expert on certain things, but parenting isn’t one of them.

He is regularly trying to figure out how he can facilitate things for me and Maria.

He constantly asks what I need, or what else he can do, and apologizes too.

I think it’s important for people who would like to have a family or for anyone who’s around families new + old  to understand that it requires so much of your heart and your mind and your body.

I joked with Greg yesterday how for my entire life I’ve been trying to be attentive and responsible, and now I realized I had it within me all along, all needed was sufficient motivation.

Greg is so motivated to take care of us.

My aunt talks about how in the delivery room everyone was checking on Maria , but Greg was solely focused on me.

He does not function well without sleep at all, but he fights to stay awake if I just want a friend to talk to or really need anything at all.

He’s grown so much as a husband and a father since we became parents but that doesn’t surprise me.

He is one of the few people who I know who is honest about their humanity. He admits when he’s self serving and when he needs help.

He never is like I got it, I can do life on my own.

He knows he needs people , he knows he needs improvement.

I admire that .

Over the years I have seen Greg transform

from college classmate to friend to boyfriend to husband to father.

In each of these roles he was teachable and teaching me.

Today as I wrote and he plays on his switch as Maria sleeps, I just think about how far we’ve come.

It’s kind of nice to think about all the unknowns  and how the blanks got filled in over the years . Most impressive for me, is how much Greg has changed. People say “people don’t change” I call B.S. 

People don’t need to change, people can easily stay stagnant, but watching Greg evolve from classmate to father over the years gives me hope in humanity. In friendships. In relationships. In life in general. 

Watching Greg live and love from the day to day ever far from perfection, but near and dear to authenticity that sends me a message loud and clear.

People are very capable of change, and maybe the most meaningful change goes hand in hand with the ability to communicate one’s humanity and commitment to self improvement.

I realized Greg’s ability to communicate his humanity and commitment to self improvement when we were dating, and this line from his vows to me he lives out every day : I can’t promise that things will always be peachy; but I can promise to love you unconditionally, to forever stay by your side as we work through things, and to cherish you like the rare & beautiful flower that you are.

I love that.

He’s never promised flawless peachy, but each day he shows up in our marriage and is committed to loving me unconditionally like he said.

We work through things large and small, he stays by side cherishing me, and with each passing day he’s changing.

It’s been so powerful for me to see him change from college classmate to loving father.

He’s changing I’m changing and you’re changing.

Let’s be intentional in it being for the better .

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